ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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