U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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