I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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