Please, let me fuck your mom
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
