Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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