"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Randomize
