CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Randomize