In the future we'll all be gay
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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