he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
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