Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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