After last night, I could never be a politician.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
