I just cut my nipple shaving
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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