Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
