remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
