No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
