I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Randomize
