she smelled like a LAN party
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
