just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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