Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize
