they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I will die if light touches me.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
