Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
