I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
