ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
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