we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Randomize
