Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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