At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
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