Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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