just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
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