I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Randomize
