Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
