Just took my morning after pill in the library
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
