he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
