so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
