My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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