i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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