saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Randomize
