capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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