She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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