Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
