is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Randomize
