I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Randomize
