how can u be prego again
I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Randomize
