ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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