let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
We need to get me chipped asap
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
