Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I don't deserve a penis
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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