this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
