i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Randomize
