i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
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