You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Randomize
