somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
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